02 Apr 2011
by Zoein Happiness, Law of attraction
I was. I learned to think toxic thoughts that hurt me from an early age. I was raised in an atmosphere of fear and scarcity where things would always go wrong, money ran through my mom’s fingers like water AND relationships were thought of as negative unsatisfying and disappointing.
My grandmother committed suicide when she was 50 and sick with emphysema. Her husband had died of a heart attack at the age of 50 as well, only 3 years before because he was so stressed and angry. Nana did not know how to move on from that and create a life for herself without him. My mom tells endless stories of her mother her father, and her grandmother arguing at the dinner table and generally being unhappy all the time.
Cancel all of that! I am breaking this pattern for the next generation!
These wonderful women who raised me were brought up with mistaken ideas about life that did not serve them well. Today my mom lives in Taos and writes beautiful music. She still worries all the time about money, disaster, rape and murder. She has never had a long-term relationship and has always been very poor financially. but despite all of this she has built a pretty good life for herself. She has a community of friends and acquaintances who put up with her crusty attitude because she is so creative and interesting.
Her mother never approved of her and tried to stop her from composing music as a child and would yell at her to “stop that twaddling and get back to her lessons. My mom knows nothing about law of attraction or positive thinking and clings to her negative system with a vengeance. Yet she is an inspiration to me in that she has always been true to her desire to be a composer even though she was not encouraged by her family or friends as a young woman coming of age in the 1950′s. She was the one who gave me a “creativity ethic”.
We are taught to disapprove of ourselves so our lives become a downward spiral of unhappiness. You can change this by taking hold of your thoughts and changing them to ones you would rather be thinking. I recently picked up the Louise Hay classic You Can Heal Your Life. I had forgotten how wonderful this book is and I had forgotten to use some of the simple concepts. She has a very open style and attitude. She gives you many wonderful ideas for shaking lose the old patterns but mentions all the other resources and modalities there are for creating change in your life.
Another great resource is the Happiness Make Over. by Amyee Coget you can get the home study version at her site. Having a happy fulfilling existence is a matter of retraining. We learned how to attract misery and stress by thinking the same thoughts over and over. We can see how this negative thinking works by looking at the society that surrounds us. Learn to think new thoughts, which cause new feelings which cause new actions and new outcomes to take place in your life.
And finally a great resource for changing beliefs and making happiness a priority is option.org and the work of Barry Neil Kaufman. His Books; Happiness is a Choice and To Love is to be Happy With, are still ground breaking even though they were written in the 80′s. The site has video, audio and at least 2 courses per month in their Sheffield MA location. They also have a system of “Power Dialogues” that you can do in person or over the phone. These are some of the most powerful happiness experts I know of.
02 Apr 2011
by Zoein Happiness
Update July 18, 2011
We have met 3 times and are getting to know each other. there are several possibilities for house sharing in the future
At the moment we are planning on buying food in bulk as a possibility.
There are surprisingly few vegan people in Berkeley who are interested in a community or they have not found this group yet.
The contact point is at
http://veganintentionalcommunity.ning.com/
Hello future friends and housemates:
You can have the home you have always wanted!You can have a group of like minded people with a garden
a supportive, warm community and beautiful clean common areas.
What and Where:
Urban vegan/high raw permaculture community forming in Berkeley CA.
Affordable rental of house or loft structure, converted commercial space, warehouse etc for
5 to 20 vegans of all ages, single, couples, kids. Artists and those involved with creativity are especially welcome.
Ideal space will have garden space in the yard and/or on the roof if suitable for reinforceing and landlord open to putting in a
grey-water system and off grid energy, recycling and composting.
Time line:
We will begin by meeting and talking about what we want and start looking
for compatable people and compatable space.
It has to be right so it will take as long as it takes and it may be several small communities that intermingle within the east bay area.
Goals and values
A comfortable place to live with like minded individuals with a balance of seperate and communal space.
Could include sharing of bulk foods and some meals, shared chores, weekly short, positive house meetings.
Compassion, happiness, beauty, spirituality, personal growth, living intentionally.
Could include collaboration, compassionate education and promotion of veganism and sustainability.
Looking for people who want to make joy and happiness a number one priority for themselves no matter how
your life has been up to this point.
Emphasis is on sustainability, in how to connect with nature and the true self here and now.
The details of daily living
Seeking those who would like to be drug and 411 and stimulant free as much as possible and save wine for special occasions
People who believe in sacred space and would like a sunny cheerful clean home with common areas that are beautiful and simple
and open and uncluttered for doing yoga, reading relaxing or entertaining friends.
Consensus process, non violent communication ideas could be applied.
Believing this is possible
You truly can have the home you want.
I know this is doable and realistic in Berkeley and other parts of the bay area, very affordably believe it or not.
I work an average of 20 hours a week teaching pilates and I live in a big brown shingle house with room for 7,
though only 5 live here, in an affluent area for only $700 a month rent including internet and utilities, with garden, and deck.
We are close to Bart so I have no need of a car. 2 similar houses right next door are full of college students.
Imagine finding three such houses all in a row and filling them with vegan permaculture intentional community people!
This would indeed be an affordable urban eco-village without having to buy land first.
About me:
Artist, turned web designer, animator, I volunteer with permaculture activities and garden work parties,
write a permacutlure blog and a creativity blog, teaching pilates in SF and work on a web store for TreeHouse Green Gifts in Berkeley.
Interests and values: making happiness a priority and spreading this value,
compassion, ethical veganism, permacutlure sustainability, personal growth.
I am pretty mellow and quiet, yoga, meditation, hiking and writing.
I am moving in the next year or two because although I have a nice house and garden in a gorgeous area with
my mates are not interested in community or consensus, intentional community or sustainabilty
or personal growth or happiness as a number one value and they like to cook meat.
I have decided to believe I can have it all. So I put this out there for you to find.
Things I think value and am working to support and spread
Happiness makeover
World Peace Diet by Will Tuttle
Continuum Concept by Jean Leadloff
Ishmael by Daniel Quinn
New tribal lifestyles
Planting Justice
Sharing Solution legalities of sharing cars, houses etc
Food Not Lawns
Berkeley Ecology Center
Personal Development for Smart People by Steve Pavlina
You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay
Happiness is a Choice by Barry Neil Kaufman